Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Denis Leary on Coffee

"Is it impossible to get a cup of coffee-flavored coffee in this country any more? What happened with coffee? Did I miss a fucking meeting with the coffee, huh? You can get every other flavour except coffee-flavoured coffee! They got Mochachino, Chocachino, Frappachino, Rappachino, Al Pacino, what the fuck? W, w, w What The Fuck dot com!

I walked into a Starbucks about a year ago, little kid behind the counter I said yeah, give me a regular. "A regular what?" Coffee.

"What flavor?" Coffee flavored coffee! I'll stick that menu right up your ass kid. Menu? Coffee doesn't need a menu, it needs a cup! That's all it needs!"
- Denis Leary

Coffee doesn't need a menu, it needs a cup!

I remember the first time I heard that. I had just gone through a very similar experience in my head that same day. But I didn't say it because the kid behind the counter is still the only person in my life who calls me "boss" regularly.

I can appreciate both sides of the counter...you just have to agree on 2 things...call it coffee if it's coffee (not Americano or Drip) ...call it espresso if it's espresso (or Americano or Cappuccino)...

if your sign says, Starbuck's Coffee, you better have coffee on the damn menu and Starbuck from Battlestar Galactica should be selling it...because YOU DON'T OWN COFFEE!! You serve something that is more beloved than any other single beverage on the planet, including cola...way to go.

If you told me you created it (I'd call you a effing liar, because I know who created coffee and it's not you), or even discovered it before anyone else did...THEN you can start calling it something else if you like because you made it...you found it. If you are using it as a part of a larger drink...fine...

Until then, it's coffee...you don't have to correct me with "drip"...it's hot water over ground coffee in a filter...

Then again...a cup of coffee by any other name will still get me outta bed.